It's A Boy Girl Thing

Hello Lovelies,

As I have explained countless times I am currently studying at Brighton university, to those who know me or have already read my blogs this will be old and boring news. To you newbies I'm just bringing you up to speed.

In my last post I touched somewhat briefly upon relationships I had developed with classmates and housemates. Therefore I decided to continue upon that theme for this post. Be warned there is content in this post relating to sex and whatnot.

I'm sure you like me will have had some wild fantasy that University would come filled to the brim with kind, gentle and honest young men with very pure intentions. Many of my friends who went to uni at 18 have all found amazing boyfriends or girlfriends and are very much in happy long term relationships. 

Some of these friends much like me had no romantic relationships through out school so it was a very exciting prospect. Luckily none of my friends to my knowledge were lead on and used by anyone. Some found solid relationships and other enjoyed a more casual attachment. Neither is better than the other it's all down to personal preference and needs at that current time.

I would like to take a moment here to blame teen movies that portray University life as either finding your one true love on day one or as one massive orgy where there are no repercussions to sexual promiscuity (which I note that there shouldn't be).

As someone who has never been on a date let alone in a relationship I'm not overly comfortable with the whole casual sex thing. However not everyone else seems to get that.

I recently had my drink spiked in a night club which scares me for two reasons; one - someone wanted to take advantage of my vulnerable state for sexual gain or two - they thought it was a funny prank. 

Neither option restores my faith in humanity.

I'm realising more and more as my time at Uni goes on that people expect a level of sexual maturity among their peers. I'm currently 20 which is two years older than your stereotypical fresher, yet at 18 I couldn't imagine being as sexually active as a handful of freshers I've seen.

I know not all freshers are horny teens. However I'm beginning to feel as though it is what is expected. 

Maybe I'm just not meeting the right kind of people but I feel as though it's a bloody miracle that even one of my friends found a meaningful relationship let alone most of them.

I know I'm wildly generalising here based on my limited view on the situation based only on what I have personally experienced. Yet as far as I can see it's the truth.

I may very soon be taking all this back and see things in a very different way. I personally hope it happens sooner rather than later.

I find something that doesn't help is the stigma with the word 'Relationship'.
Having never had one myself I am by no means an expert in them, however I get the sense the word puts the fear of god into guys.

I'm constantly perplexed as to why the term makes boys run a mile. Is a relationship so bad? Do they genuinely think a relationship requires any extra effort then regular casual sex?

Maybe I'm just not cut out to be wanted for anything that requires the lights being on and conversation with real substance to it. Yes I am re-accounting my own somewhat embarrassing encounters here but I don't really have anywhere else to draw perspective from without having some rather awkward conversations with my friends.

Before posting this I did have a conversation with my friend Christy about this very topic. It was a good giggle and put my mind at ease. She says she would totally date me. Huzzah

We've all had those awkward drunken kisses and fumbles and that's all well and good. But is sex the be all and end all.

Maybe I just need to buck up my ideas, lie back and think of England. Or be patient and keep waiting and hope I one day be dateable.

Hopefully not before my best before date.

Haha I'm so very funny

Take care all more deep and exciting thought to come your way.

Iona xoxo